John Mulaney. He’s hilarious. He writes for SNL. And his entire stand up special is on Youtube. It’s called New In Town. Go watch it and cry like I did.
I would marry this man
guys we broke another post because this one’s not showing any notes
i feel bad for teachers because i distinctly remember my mom bursting into tears once when she was grading papers and she was just mumbling “theyre so goddamn stupid” over and over
every time i read this i laugh a little harder
I don’t get why bras are so expensive I mean I didn’t choose the boob life the boob life chose me
the first step to robbing a bank is picking out a cute outfit
you all deserve someone who isnt embarrassed to love you and tells all their friends about you and saves your selfies, good and bad to look at when they miss you and loses sleep to talk to you and tells you how much they love you. i hope you all find that!!
Have you ever lost something and thought, “if I could just open a portal to another reality where I haven’t lost it, I could steal it from me and get it back”?
How do you know that’s not the reason you lost it
This is the exact plot of Fringe
this has a deeper meaning. the light bulb represents an idea of an individual and the mouse trap represents how quick society is to destroy that idea.
are you fucking retarded no its just a lightbulb falling on a mousetrap shut the fuck upGuys idk what the meaning is but if it is what the first person said you’re kind of proving it right. She said her idea and now you’re judging it, just like she said society would.
woah^I fucking love you third person you are perfect